


Never Again

by LittleMissTrouble



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Accidents, Arguing, Drug Use, Gen, Guilt, M/M, Mpreg, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-19
Updated: 2017-01-08
Packaged: 2018-09-09 17:47:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8905597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleMissTrouble/pseuds/LittleMissTrouble
Summary: Mickey and Ian are expecting. Ian's been doing great but one night he let's work get the best of him and makes a bad decision he ends up truly regretting.





	1. Chapter 1

Ian rolled over grabbing at the side of the empty bed. He opened his eyes squinting at the intruding light from the window. 

“Mick, Mickey…” 

“I’m in the bathroom, like always.” Mickey walks out of the bathroom slowly, his hand pressed against his lower back. 

“You okay?” Ian pulls himself up to sit dropping his legs to the ground. 

Mickey nods, “Yeah, just had to pee.” 

Mickey walks over standing in front of Ian. Ian wraps one arm around Mickey laying his hand on the sore spot on Mickey’s back rubbing his thumb into it. He leans in and kisses Mickey’s round belly. He feels a slight movement and kisses it again laying his face against the smooth skin. “Good Morning, Little one.” 

Ian smiles up at Mickey pulling his hand softly leading him down to the bed. Mickey smirks sitting down and leans into Ian for a kiss. 

“Sorry bout the morning breath.” He stare's into Mickey’s eyes keeping his lips close enough to still have contact. 

“You’ve had worse.” Ian chuckles but Mickey silences him with another kiss. He tugs at Mickey’s boxers pulling them down. 

“Oh, it’s like that huh.” Mickey lays on his side so Ian can curl up behind him spooning him. He nuzzles his face against Mickey’s neck before pushing inside him. Mickey raises his leg slightly for a better angle while Ian keeps a slow but steady rhythm. 

They’re both letting out small groans and grunts. Ian’s thrusts stutter and Mickey knows what Ian wants but won’t ask. 

“Ian…Ian. Go a little faster.” Mickey moans as he tosses his hand backwards ringing his fingers through Ian’s hair. 

“You sure? Your back…” Ian’s voice sounding uncertain. 

“No, no just a little. It’s okay…please.” 

That was all the confirmation Ian needed. He sped up enough to get them both where they needed to be without being too rough. 

Mickey gasped as Ian’s body shuddered behind him both coming down from a natural orgasmic high. Ian laid plastered against Mickey’s back taking deep breaths letting his fast beating heart slow to a normal pace before pulling out of his boyfriend. 

Mickey shuffled on to his backside eyes closed. He could have fallen asleep had Ian not leaned closely to his ear. 

“Want to hang at my families? I gotta work tonight anyway. Rather you be there than here.” 

Colin had just gotten out of jail a few days ago and had been partying it up since. After the first night at Colin’s Welcome Home party Ian had been keeping Mickey away feeling it unsafe for him to be surrounded by all these guys. 

Mickey had run the streets and scrapped with many of them in the past. Ian worried in their drunken, high stupor they’d forget they were dealing with 7 ½ month pregnant Mickey, not the old Mickey they’d known in the past. 

Mickey shrugged his shoulders, “Sure, you wanna shower first?” Ian nodded giving Mickey a kiss on the top of his head before heading to the bathroom.

Ian was still working at the club which Mickey didn’t love but it wasn’t so bad. For one thing Ian was taking his medication. Before Mickey had gotten pregnant Ian had not been taking his meds on a regular basis. Some of Ian’s behavior at the club had gotten out of hand and Mickey had a hard time trusting him. When Mickey found out he was pregnant Ian started taking his meds on schedule, no exceptions. He also asked to become a permanent bartender so he only danced when it was needed. The tips were lower but it helped keep him out of trouble. He wanted to prove to himself and Mickey he was ready to be a dad. 

Mickey didn’t mind staying overnight at the Gallagher’s when Ian was working. He knew Ian felt better when Mickey wasn’t alone. Besides he’d actually begun to enjoy it. Even though it was crazy half the time they had a family vibe that was lacking in his house. The kids mostly and surprisingly Lip looked out for him when he was there bringing him snacks and helping him when he needed it. 

After they were showered and dressed they headed over to the Gallagher’s to hang before Ian left for work. 

After dinner Mickey sends Ian a text checking on him. Ian usually sent him texts whenever he had a chance but he hadn’t gotten one yet. Mickey figured he was having a busy night and ended up watching movies with the rest of the Gallagher’s. Ian was working until 1am so Mickey thought he might try waiting up but by 11:00 his eyes were heavy and he caught himself falling asleep during the movie. 

Lip shook his head, “Mickey, go upstairs. You’re falling asleep on the couch.” Liam was asleep on Fiona’s lap but everyone else was awake watching the movie. 

Debbie leans in. “You’ll wake up sore tomorrow.” Mickey looks at his phone, no texts from Ian. “Yeah, alright.” He uses the armrest to pull himself up from the couch and shuffles towards the stairs. 

“Need help there.” Lip smirks as Mickey turns around. “No, I can manage.” Mickey turns back going up the stairs. 

Fiona giggles slapping Lip on the knee. Lip loves bugging Mickey, especially since he got pregnant. They used to trade insults back and forth but as time went on it turned into something else. They gave each other a hard time, called each other names still but in a brotherly, you’re a pain in my ass but I still care sort of way. Fiona and Lip watched until Mickey reached the top steps disappearing from sight. 

Mickey laid on his side facing the window. The room was dark except for the small slice of light from outside. The baby rolled around a few times so Mickey gently rubbed circles on his stomach humming. He thought the baby might be trying to find a comfortable position or maybe he just missed his other daddy.


	2. Chapter 2

Mickey’s eyes blink open quickly, a loud thumping noise pulls him out of sleep. He pushes himself up to look at the alarm clock. Its 3:45 am and Ian’s not in bed with him. He hears another thumping noise and decides to get up. 

Maybe Ian was downstairs getting something to eat. Oh, the idea of eating made Mickey grab his robe and head to the door. He had to pee anyway. 

Ian reaches the top of the step before he loses balance and lands forward one knee hitting the top step hard. He grabs the railing to steady himself. Mickey cringes when he opens the door seeing Ian's knee make hard contact with the ground. 

Ian pulls himself up and leans against the nearby wall. He rubs his knee and spots Mickey, "Shit, that fuckin' hurt". Ian laughs but stops when Mickey doesn't join him. 

Ian's eyes are glassy and bloodshot. His words come out slightly slurred and he's smiling at Mickey...but it's empty. Is he waiting to see if Mickey will be mad at him or is that guilt? 

Mickey couldn't help but think about the times Ian came home to him just like this. The times he crawled into bed smelling like alcohol, smoke, sweat and sometimes sex. 

Mickey shakes his head knowing sometimes his mind can get ahead of itself. Ian's been so good lately. He takes a breath not wanting to jump to any conclusions. 

But still Ian is clearly fucked up and he doesn't just look drunk. He looks high. 

"Ian, you okay?" 

Ian pushes himself off the wall stepping closer to Mickey. Ian smiles and plants his hand on the back of Mickey's neck. 

"I'm good, babe." He lays a sloppy kiss on Mickey's lips. Mickey doesn't stop him but doesn't encourage him to continue. Ian keeps his hand behind Mickey's neck as he stares at him. 

"Ian, are you on something?" Ian's smile dips slightly, "Mick, I'm in a good mood. Don't ruin it." 

Mickey huffed annoyed that Ian avoided answering his question but he's not in the mood to argue. He was still tired and didn’t have the energy to go toe to toe with Ian about him getting wasted. They could deal with it later. 

“Ian, what the hell!” Ian turned around at hearing Lip’s voice. Lip stood outside his bedroom door with his arms crossed as his eyes studied Ian’s appearance. He didn’t like what he saw.

“Are you seriously high right now?” 

Ian rolled his eyes and sneered in Lip’s direction. “Are you seriously coming at me for being high? You were high and drunk two days ago. I got high with you! Go back to your room, man. We’re busy.” 

“You had two beers and smoked a joint with me.” Lip notices the white powder slightly rimming his nostril. He had promised to stay away from anything stronger than weed. 

Ian turns his attention back to Mickey too quickly. His hand slips from the wall and he takes a small step forward as Mickey grabs his arms bracing him. 

Mickey’s eyes look alarmed and Lip pulls Ian away. “Be careful man. He’s pregnant or did you forget when you were stuffing shit up your nose. ” 

Lip points his finger towards Ian’s face. Ian pushes Lip’s hand away but self-consciously rubs his nostrils with his hands. Lip smirks triumphantly as if Ian’s just proven him right. 

It pisses Ian off. 

“You think you know fucking everything. How do you judge me? You get drunk all the time. You’re an alcoholic, just like Frank.” 

Ian pauses, his thoughts scattered... “And you wanna tell me about my boyfriend. You can’t tell me shit about Mickey!” He shoves Lip on the chest making him stumble back. 

Lip rolls his eyes having heard this before. Lip knows he’s shit at his own relationships but he’s better at looking from the outside with clearer eyes than from within. And maybe he doesn’t know everything but that doesn’t make him wrong now. 

Bedroom doors start opening. Fiona comes out of her room. The kids are standing in the doorways watching. 

Lip and Ian are staring each other down neither wanting to back away. “Fi, he’s high.” 

Ian looks like he wants to choke Lip for opening his mouth. Fiona is not his mother and Lip is not his father. 

“Don’t talk about me like I’m a kid. I’m not that high! If anything I’m coming down.” Ian starts laughing at his own joke. He stops when no one else laughs. 

“I drank and yeah I took a bump or two of coke. Not like it’s all the time.” 

Fiona frowns folding her arms, “You’ve been so good with work and your meds. Don’t slip back into that old shit again.” 

Lip still fuming from Ian pushing him chimes in, “Yeah, Mickey can’t throw you over his shoulder and carry you home this time.” 

Mickey looks up at the ceiling briefly and takes a deep breath. He knows Ian is going to get riled up again now that Lip opened his big mouth. He just wanted to pee, get something to eat and get a few more hours sleep. Was that too much to ask for! 

Ian’s eyes could burn holes into Lip the way he’s staring at him. “Why don’t you…” 

Mickey grabs Ian’s arm lightly, “Hey, Hey forget this. Let’s make something to eat downstairs.” Ian turns his attention to Mickey, his eyes lighting up instantly. “Let’s go to the room first, eat later.” 

Ian pulls Mickey against him wrapping his arm around his waist, his hand firmly landing on Mickey’s ass. Mickey smiles happy to distract him but then his eyebrows inquisitively go up as he sniffs Ian’s shirt. Mickey frowns, “Ian, is that cologne? You don’t wear cologne.” 

Ian drops his hands and turns away from everyone. He runs his hands over his face several times and turns towards Mickey with an annoyed look. 

“Are you going to give me shit too? You’re supposed to be on my side not pulling this insecure jealousy bullshit in front of them. It’s like fucking ammunition to them!” 

Ian steps closer to Mickey. Mickey doesn’t mean to do it but he protectively throws his arm over his stomach. He isn’t worried that Ian would do anything to hurt him it’s just instinctual but Lip sees it and that’s enough. 

“Back off Ian, go sleep it off.” Lip edges closely to Ian grabbing his arm. Ian plants the palm of his hand into Lip’s face pushing him back, “Fuck off Lip!” 

“Hey, knock it off.” Fiona yells at them. They start tussling with each other neither letting go of their grip, completely forgetting Mickey is right in the midst of it. 

Mickey gets pissed. He’s stuck near the wall between these two grappling morons.

Fiona yells at them again. Mickey grabs Ian’s arm hoping to move him enough so he can slide past safely. If they wanted to beat the hell out of each other they could go right ahead. They’re both big boys and it’s how him and his brothers resolved their problems. 

“Move!” 

Ian feels Mickey grab him but he’s too consumed with Lip. “Stop Mickey.” 

Ian pulls his arm away from Mickey’s grip. There isn’t much room so Mickey steps back. His socked feet misstep and he loses his balance. 

It happens so fast. 

Mickey feels himself slipping and quickly throws his hand out to stop his fall. His hand grazes the wall slipping off. He hears a loud gasp and quickly turns his body sideways not wanting to fall on his stomach. His hand hits the ground...hard.

Mickey lets out a short painful cry. He’s thankful his hand got most of the impact but the pain that shoots through his wrist is terrible. The side of his hip throbs slightly and he knows he’ll have bruises soon. 

Debbie screams and covers her mouth with her hands, her eyes held in shock. Liam buries his face into Debbie’s side letting out a muffled sniffle. 

“Oh shit.” Carl whispers low but doesn’t move. 

“Oh my god, are you okay!” Fiona yells moving towards them. Lip stands his mouth gaping open as Ian drops to the ground next to Mickey. 

Ian starts touching Mickey all over, “Oh god, Mick. I…I wasn’t trying to…I didn’t mean to...to” 

Fiona dropped to his side as well trying to talk over Ian. Mickey stares at Ian who's babbling, his hands shaking. 

“Stop, it’s alright. Just...just help me up.” 

Lip drops down to the floor, “Wait, are you sure? I don’t think we should move you.” 

“I should lay here waiting for what? Help me up before I pee on myself!” 

Lip and Fiona grab Mickey gently helping him up. The look Fiona gives Ian makes him back up and let them take over. He gets up from the ground getting some control over his nerves. 

Mickey doesn’t look Ian in the eyes as he speaks even though he can feel Ian desperately trying to make eye contact. “Broke my fall, didn’t land on my stomach.” 

Ian hears a whimper and turns towards it. He forgot the kids were still there, watching. Carl and Liam seem okay but Debbie is glaring at him. She blames him, he can tell. She thinks this is his fault and he doesn’t blame her cause she’s right. 

“Mickey, your hand.” Ian steps forward to touch it but Lip moves faster. 

“Let me check it okay?” Mickey nods at Lip as he moves softly over Mickey’s fingers, hand and wrist. Mickey winces, parts of his pale hand already turning shades of red and purple. “Ah, Fuckin' hurts.” 

Lip let’s go, “It could be sprained or broken. We need to take you to the hospital.”

Mickey nods again, “yeah, I need to make sure the baby’s okay.” Ian moves closer caressing Mickey’s hair gently. “Let’s get you dressed okay.” 

Mickey finally looks up at Ian. In Ian’s eyes he can see guilt, he can see remorse but he also sees the gleaming dilation as Ian comes down from his previous high and he can’t help but feel angry and disappointed. 

He looks away, “I gotta use the bathroom first.” Lip and Fiona look at each other silently communicating. Fiona gently leads Mickey to the bathroom. 

“Debs, grab some of Mickey’s clothes.” 

Ian starts to follow but Lip stops him. He sighs and gently says, “I’ll get you some coffee while he gets dressed. Clean yourself up before we get to the hospital.” 

They borrow Kev’s car and drive to the ER. Ian sits in the back with Mickey. After splashing water on his face and downing some coffee he feels more like himself. The keyed up jolts of energy he had are fading leaving him with a somber, hazy feeling instead. 

Mickey stares out the window leaning against the door, not on Ian’s side like he usually does. Ian fumbles with his fingers on his knee really wanting to reach over and touch Mickey. He wants to hold him and apologize but it’s not the time. Mickey’s body language is screaming, 'Back Off!" 

Forcing things is usually Ian’s MO but he thinks that would upset Mickey more right now. 

Ian catches his brother and sister glancing at them from the front view mirror. Lip turns on the radio to break up the silence. 

When they first got in the car Ian had asked if Mickey was okay, if the ice he had was enough and if he had any pains near his stomach. Mickey spoke to him with calm, short answers but he never looked away from his view outside. 

Mickey watched the rain wetting everything in sight. The sky still dark but a bit more muted than earlier. The rain starts coming down harder making his view less visible but it doesn’t matter. He sits quietly with his limp hand resting on his lap. It’s throbbing, it hurts but the ice is helping a bit. 

He’s not really angry anymore but he doesn’t want to talk. He’s feeling emotional be it the hormones or just the events of the morning he doesn’t know. If he says more he may lose it and cry. He doesn’t want to cry in front of Lip or Fiona. 

If he cries Ian will too. He can tell. He can’t focus on Ian now. He knows he has a tendency to put Ian’s needs before his own or so he's been told.

But he can’t. His hand hurts like hell and his hip is really starting to ache. When the baby comes Ian won’t always be his #1 priority and Ian will have to deal with it. 

Mickey lets out a sigh. Why did this happen? Is Ian bored? Not ready for this? Not happy enough with him and the baby? Mickey blinks as his eyes water. He wipes them away with his sleeve as they pull into the hospital parking lot.


	3. Chapter 3

Ian’s pulled out of his thoughts when he hears a heavy sigh. He catches Mickey wiping away tears with his sleeve. FUCK! He feels so bad. He can’t just do nothing. Even if Mickey gets mad…even if he pushes him away 

They park the car. Ian jumps out and runs around to Mickey’s door. He opens a large umbrella that can cover them both. Mickey lays his injured hand across his chest and covers it with his other hand for support. Ian makes sure they don't get wet and wraps his arm around Mickey’s back. 

Mickey doesn’t lean on him but he doesn’t tell him to fuck off either. 

Lip and Fiona follow behind giving them some space. When they get to the ER they don’t wait long due to Mickey’s condition. Fiona leaves to check in at work and Lip stays behind in the waiting room. 

Ian sits on the plastic chair downing a cup of water. He'd been alternating between water and coffee since they left the house. Besides running down the hall for a monster pee and feeling worn out he is mostly himself again. The altered state he was in earlier pretty much fading away. 

Mickey laid on the bed in a semi sitting position. His eyes closed, hands resting on his round stomach. He yawns and adjusts the ice pack on his wrist. Ian didn't know if Mickey's eyes were closed because he was exhausted or avoiding talking to him. Probably both. Ian sighed as he stroked his hand down Mickey's thigh. 

Mickey looks calmer than when he came in. His first words to the nurses at the desk was, "I fell and I need to hear my babies heartbeat!" One nurse just stared at Mickey unmoved but a younger nurse came from behind the desk quickly. After glaring at the other nurse who pretended not to notice she put her stethoscope into Mickey's ears placing the resonator against his belly. Once he heard the thump – thump – thump he let out a shaky cry he didn't realize he was holding inside. 

Ian felt relieved but guilty for how Mickey was feeling right now. They wouldn't be there dealing with this shit if it wasn't for him. He'd had a good reason for getting high or at least he'd thought it was worth it at the time. He'd have to explain himself to Mickey later. 

"Hello, I'm Dr. Monroe." An older man with a friendly face approaches them. He smiles at Ian before turning to Mickey who's eyes opened wide once he heard the doctor's voice. 

"Let's see what we have here, okay. This is going to hurt but I'll give you something for the pain after." 

Dr. Monroe started threading his fingers over Mickey's fingers, hand and wrist. he then moves Mickey's hand gently to the left and to the right. Ian clamped his teeth down hard as he watched Mickey's face twist in pain. When Mickey let's out a sharp yelp Ian jumps up from the chair. "I think that's enough, don't you?" 

The doctor lays Mickey's hand down on a small pillow and puts the ice pack back in place. He nods at Ian, "Yes, that's fine. Mickey your hand and fingers are bruised and slightly swollen but your wrist is definitely sprained. The good news is nothing is broken. We'll have a nurse wrap it up." 

"Now, I know you had a brief exam done on your stomach when you came in but I'd like to see for myself. Are you experiencing pain anywhere else?" 

Mickey bites down on his lip before he answers. "Umm, I don't feel pain near my stomach but when I fell I landed on my side. It's hurting more now though." 

"Mick, why didn't you say something?" Ian looks concerned and a little hurt. 

"We had enough to worry about. I wasn’t trying to ice you out, okay." 

The doctor stands by carefully watching their exchange. "I'd like to check the area. Could you step outside for a moment, Mr. Gallagher." The friendliness in his demeanor was replaced with a more sterile tone. 

"Why would I need to leave now?" Ian frowned completely confused by the doctor's 180 degree attitude change. 

"Doc, I want him to stay." Mickey gestured towards Ian. The doctor pastes on a weak smile. "Very well, Mickey let's raise your shirt." The doctor gently pulled Mickey's shirt up before clicking his tongue in disapproval. 

Ian's mouth opened slightly but nothing came out. Mickey stared at his hip not looking too surprised. He must have known he'd be bruised but hadn't said anything before. Mickey's hip had a bruise surrounded by small red and purple flecks. Ian thought it looked tender and painful. 

The doctor prods the area, "I wish you'd mentioned this sooner. It seems to be only bruising but the hip is a delicate area. You're lucky you didn't break it. In your condition it could have made healing complicated." 

"The nurse will come and give you something safe for the pain. As a precaution I want to do an ultrasound but before we do that I'd like to discuss a few things with you alone." Dr. Monroe turns to Ian, "It's just procedural, you understand." 

Ian nods and kisses Mickey on the head before leaving the room. He was glad to leave at that moment. He'd felt like he was going to break down and it took all his willpower to keep it at bay. Now that his head was clearer he couldn’t stop thinking about how much worse things could have gone. Ian's eyes watered and he slammed his fist on the wall. 

"Hey, what's going on?" Ian felt a hand on his shoulder. He'd almost forgotten Lip had stayed behind in the waiting room. 

Lip leads Ian towards the waiting area. "Talk to me." 

Ian frowns shaking his head. "I just...I feel like such a dick. Mickey's wrist is sprained and he's in pain because of me. I'm a fucking idiot." 

Lip sighed, "You did something stupid but we all do. It's like ingrained in our DNA." Ian huffs with a small grin crossing his face. 

"I gotta ask though, what made you get high at work?" 

When Ian started working at the club he was drinking and getting high with his co-workers and the clientele. He did thing's he regretted that Mickey had eventually found out about. They were fighting a lot and everyone thought they'd end up breaking up but they didn't. Ian had turned things around. Lip knew how much Ian loved Mickey and how happy he was about the baby so...why? 

Ian rubbed the back of his neck. "I was bartending as usual. Two of the dancers called in sick and this group came in, surgeons from a convention. You know the kinds that want to have discreet fun away from their trophy wives." 

"Well my boss asked me if I wanted to help entertain, keep them happy. He offered to pay me for my regular bartending and a dancers hours. Double pay plus tips, man! With the baby coming I thought easy money but they were out of control. They were pushing drinks at us and then one pulls out coke. The other dancers did it and then I look over and see my boss watching. I can't afford to get fired right now so I did it. I didn't mean for any of this shit to happen!" 

"Look, it happened. Tell him why you did it, kiss his ass a little and say no next time." 

Ian nods, "Yeah...yeah. You should go home. Don't worry about me and Mickey. I got money for a cab." 

Lip pats Ian on the shoulder and heads out. A few minutes later Ian sees Dr. Monroe heading his way. 

"Mr. Gallagher, I just sent the nurse in to give Mickey a sonogram and something for the pain. He seems to really want to go home but I want him to stay at least another hour for observation. I have another case to attend to but I've instructed the nurse to have your paperwork ready within that time. Here's an appointment slip and prescription for medication that is safe to take in his condition. He can only take this. I've also given him instructions and a compress for that wrist. Don't let him overdue it, he needs to take it easy." 

The doctor nods and before walking away turns back to Ian, eyebrows cocked. "Take good care of him, Mr. Gallagher." 

"Of course." Ian balks at the somewhat strange exchange and heads to rejoin Mickey.


	4. Chapter 4

When they get to the house Ian steers Mickey to the couch while he scrambles together some leftovers. Mickey had only eaten the snacks Ian found in the hospital vending machine since his meal last night.  He watches as Mickey scarfs down everything on his plate. They sit on the couch for a while letting their food digest until Ian see's Mickey's eyes fluttering heavily.  

"Come on, you need some sleep. Bathroom first?" Mickey nods at him and Ian leads him upstairs. As they head to the bedroom Lip comes out of his room. He's bare chested and wearing shorts.  

"Thought I heard you guys, what's the prognosis?" 

Mickey throws a thumbs up, "Baby is great, me not so much." He extends his arm out showing his wrapped wrist and hand.  

Lip makes a face, he can see bruises shadowing the top of Mickey's fingers. The bandage probably covering the worst of the injury.  

"No cast, least it's not broken. You're lucky." 

Ian huffs and softly says, "Yeah, lucky."  

After their talk at the hospital Lip had dropped any anger he had towards his brother. Ian had fucked up but he'd had good intentions. When he saw Ian stumbling into the house hours earlier Lip thought he was back to the old Ian, who selfishly thought about himself first. But he knew that wasn't the case anymore. Lip smiled encouragingly at Ian hoping his brother and Mickey worked things out quickly. Mickey was good for Ian and they're having a baby together. He wasn't sure Ian could handle losing them.  

After reaching the bedroom Ian undressed Mickey who could barely keep his eyes open. Mickey laid his good hand on Ian's shoulder getting his attention. "I...I'm so tired." 

Ian touched Mickey's cheek with his hand. "I know, let me just grab the blanket." Ian helped Mickey lie down comfortably on his side propping Mickey's hand on a pillow for support. He pulled the fluffy blanket over Mickey up to his chest. When he starts to climb off the bed Mickey grabs his wrist, "Stay".

Mickey looks up at Ian with heavy lids. Ian climbs in behind Mickey spooning him, placing his hand on Mickey's hip. 

Mickey moves Ian's hand across his belly before quickly passing out.  

Ian watches Mickey soundly sleeping. His chest moving slightly as he breathes in and out. His earlier pained expression is gone replaced with this peaceful look Ian finds so adorable. It gives him a bit of relief. 

But what would have happened... What would have happened if his brother and sister weren't there? He didn't felt angry at them anymore, he felt grateful. They were looking out for him and for Mickey too. 

Mickey was family now. Not just to him but to all the Gallagher's. He had to explain what happened. He needed Mickey to know. Ian yawned and nuzzled his face into the back of Mickey's neck lulling himself to sleep to the sounds of Mickey's soft snores. 

********** 

Mickey feels the heat from Ian's body pulled away from his back. Cool air chills him for a moment before he feels a blanket covering him again. He's so tired he quickly falls back asleep. 

Later when he finally opens his eyes his view lands straight to his wrapped hand resting on the pillow. It hurts and he feels a dulled aching in his lower body.  He hears the faint sound of a familiar song coming from a radio.  

"Ian, you here?" Ian walks in from the hall fully dressed and looking a lot better now. Mickey's sure the same could not be said about himself. 

"Hey, I'm making homemade chicken soup." Ian sits on the bed handing Mickey a glass of water. Mickey tips the glass to his lips until the water's completely gone. Ian takes the glass from him and adjusts the pillow as Mickey shifts closer to the headboard. He absently rubs his belly with his good hand. 

"How are you feeling?" Ian's eyes scan Mickey up and down. 

"Shitty". Mickey gave Ian a half smile, "but I'll live." Ian pulled Mickey's hand up to his lips and kissed it softly before mumbling, "sorry." They stared at each other for a moment but the quiet becomes uncomfortable. 

Ian placed Mickey's hand back on his belly. "You have an appointment in two days. Hopefully everything will be okay." Ian got up and started picking up clothes from the floor. His nervous energy and fidgety demeanor was not lost on Mickey. Ian was feeling guilty and insecure but trying not to show it.  

"Ian, the doctor said the baby's fine. It's just a follow-up."  

Ian nods, "I know, I know. I hope we don't get the same doctor though. He was kind of a dick." 

Mickey bit down on his lip as he traced shapes on his protruding belly. "Uhm, yeah about that. That doctor asked me if my fall was really an accident or if I was covering up." 

"Covering up, covering up for what?" Mickey could see the exact moment Ian understood what he was saying. His face went from innocent confusion to being pissed in 2.5 seconds.  

"He thinks I pushed you!" Mickey raised his palm out silently asking Ian to stop so he could finish. Ian pressed his lips together tightly. 

"He asked me if we'd been fighting. If you've ever hurt me before or whatever. I told him no okay!" 

Ian shook his head, "Jesus, why? Why would he ask you that? Do I look like some abusive asshole." 

Mickey knew Ian felt like shit already and this was making it worse but he couldn't sugarcoat shit for him. 

"You looked like you were coming off a fuckin' bender. It was pretty obvious Ian. I told him he had you all wrong but come on. What do you expect?" 

Damn, he couldn't believe that doctor thought he beat up his pregnant boyfriend. He didn't know the man so he shouldn't care what some stranger thinks but still.... it was messed up.  

"I don't know what I expected. Not that. I'm not some strung out boyfriend beating tweaker." 

"I know that and you do too. That's what counts alright. Alright..." Ian nods his head. He looks a bit defeated and Mickey doesn't want to dump things on him all at once but if he doesn't get what's in his head out right now he might not at all. 

"I gotta say something and I need you to be honest. Don't tell me shit you think I want to hear. I don't want that." 

Ian sighs ready to be told off for his behavior hours earlier. Mickey adjusts his hand on the pillow before looking up at Ian from underneath his eyelashes. He looks nervous which takes Ian by surprise because he was expecting to be at the end of a nasty tongue lashing. 

"If this...isn't what you wanted. If you're not happy with me and the baby you shouldn't have stopped using condoms or acted so excited when I told you I was pregnant. I don't want you to be with me cause you think it's what you're expected to do. In the past I let you hurt me. Let you do things that hurt me and let you get away with it because I didn't want to lose you. I can't do that anymore. I won't let you hurt this baby because you feel trapped or fuckin' discontent." 

"You can't do the same things you did before and you gotta accept that. I get it man, people see me different now too ever since I started showing. We're different and things can't be the same. But If you're not happy I'm not gonna hold on to you hoping you come around. I want to be with you....I love you but if you don't want this. I...I can handle it on my own." 

Ian feels like he can't breathe. This was not what he thought Mickey was going to say. He had no idea Mickey felt this way. Ian's eyes felt wet but he couldn't help but smile as he stared at his boyfriend. Mickey's voice cracked and his lip shook slightly but he held his head high proudly. Ian expected nothing less from his little Southside warrior.  

Ian scoots closer to Mickey taking his hand. He runs his thumb over the letters covering Mickey's thin fingers. "I do not want out. I want you and I want our baby. I'm not trying to fuck up what we have. Please don't think I don't want this, it's all I want. I would never intentionally hurt either of you. It was an accident." 

"I know that. I know you didn't do it on purpose but it happened. It happened cause you came home high. I'm not saying you gotta be a fucking Saint, god knows I'm not but that was really fucked." Mickey nods his head in the direction of his hand, "This right here sucks!" 

Ian shakes his head, "I know and I'm so sorry. Can I explain to you what happened at work?" 

Ian runs through the details of the night. He tells Mickey about his boss, the extra money, the well-to-do doctors and how his plans went south. He tells Mickey how he felt pressured but didn't cheat. He never cheated which he knew was something Mickey still worried about.  

"But we haven't been doing bad with money. Yeah, you make less than you used to and I'm not bringing in shit right now but we stretch your check okay. I don't want you doing reckless shit to make money." 

Mickey notices Ian's eyes shift awkwardly down. He's seen this look before. "What is it? What're you not telling me?" 

Ian looks up never letting go of Mickey's hand. "I didn't want to stress you with this but....I don't want you running scams anymore." 

"What are you talking about?" 

"After the baby is born, I don't want you running scams anymore. I don't want you doing any illegal shit for money anymore. It's been driving me crazy lately. I know you stopped cause your pregnant but I know when the baby comes you'll end up doing something dangerous with Iggy for money. I keep imaging you getting hurt, arrested or dammit, you could get killed Mickey! If I told you that you'd take it like I'm forbidding you. When my boss waved that extra money in my face I thought I could bring it home and convince you I could take care of you. You wouldn't have to risk getting locked up ever again." 

"This why you been so tense lately? You big dummy, you should have talked to me. I thought you were getting cold feet or something. I figured this stunt was you wanting out. Ian, I don't want to run scams anymore. I'm not trying to lose my freedom, I want to be here. I already decided to go legit months ago." 

Ian's mouth dropped open. 

"I'd a' told you if you'd asked. I don't expect either of us to be perfect or never fuck up because we will but you can't mess around with your medication." 

"Mick, I'm making you a promise right now that I won't do anything like that again. It doesn't matter what the situation is I will walk away. I won't let that happen, never again." 

Ian holds Mickey's chin with his hand and kisses him gently on the lips. "I love you." 

Mickey leans in reciprocating the kiss. He pulls back, "How much money did you make last night?" 

Ian grabs his messenger bag pulling out a wad of rolled up bills. He shows Mickey and stashes the cash in his dresser. 

Debbie's voice echoes from downstairs, "Ian! the soup is ready." 

Mickey gently slides off the bed. He watches and a frown crosses Ian's lips.  

"I kept trying to protect you from everyone, except for me." 

Mickey steps closely to Ian as if he's going to kiss him but he doesn't. He grins but slaps Ian lightly on the back of his head, "You'll do better." 

"I will." When they walk out of the bedroom Ian stops at the top of the stairs. "I feel embarrassed. Now I have to face the rest of them." 

Mickey takes Ian's hand and locks their fingers together. "They'll understand. I do." 

********** 

Ian watches Mickey eating for two. Mickey laughs at something Debbie whispers to him in his ear.  

Ian can't help but think as a couple they've had some serious ups and downs. They're both still young and trying to figure out their lives together. There will be more mistakes, they've both made some big ones in the past. But they love each other and have a baby on the way. 

They're a work in progress. That mean's a lot more than some bullshit sense of perfection.    
   
   
 

**Author's Note:**

> I started working on this a while ago and something else but I've been going between the two slowly adding here and there. Posting part always helps me to write faster plus this will be a short one.


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